29 September 2007

I'm Morgan LeFay, I beguiled Merlin, and all I got was this blond child


Chris brought Ingrid up to the farmer's market. My boothmate Crystal had her 3 year old daughter there, too. Fun was had by all. Asha and Ingrid are both cherubic blond little imps, and they get along very well. Crystal and I watched Asha and Ingrid do cute things, ate free food, and didn't sell much of anything. I sold one bottle of edible massage oil. Slow day, end of season. Anyway, so this woman came up to our booth to ask if we were interested in having a booth at a local charity event in December. After she gave us the details (I thought about it), she asked if Asha and Ingrid were sisters. "Nope," we said. We pointed out who was whose baby. Then the woman looked at me with total disbelief and said, "How on earth did you get a blond daughter?"

Let me just stop here and describe what's going through my head at this moment. I want to be rude. I want to point out to her how obnoxious her question is. I want to say equally obnoxious and flip things, like "I had sex with a blond elf or fairy or some freakishly blond unhuman creature. Doesn't matter what he was, he was so blond I was blinded by the light in his hair. Nine months later I felt ill, I leaned up against a tree and pushed and pushed and out came this little blond thing. I think she might be a changeling, or a halfling. It's amazing when you think about it. They've written songs about this sort of thing, and I never believed them until I gave birth to a blonde baby." Unfortunately I didn't say any of this, because I might want in on her little charity event. So I say, "Her father's blond."

And she just doesn't stop. "Well he must be really blond." Now what am I to say to this? "Why yes, you nosy and annoying wench, he's freakishly blond. The doctors thought he was an albino until they ran tests on him. He's so blond he was given automatic citizenship by Denmark and Norway, on top of his Swedish citizenship." I don't say any of this. I'm trying to be polite and I'm horribly insulted. Instead, I say, "yeah. He's pretty blond. But my older daughter looks just like me."

At this point I have no interest in participating in the charity event. I don't really like having to justify the genetic makeup of my children. I thought the "are you babysitting" comment I've received was insulting, but this one takes the cake. It wasn't so much what she said, as much as it was her attitude. How could I possibly create such a thing? I must be part of some kind of freak family to have such a freakishly blond child.

Why do people say stupid shit and get away with it? Why did I hold my tongue?

2 comments:

Meg said...

I would have given you $5 if you had, in fact, said either of those things to her. In an area where no-one looks twice at a little Asian girl with an obviously non-Asian woman, this is just messed up. I find increasingly I err on the side of 'it's her kid until she tells me otherwise'

joshua said...

$10!